Ok to Ingest Sperm?
If you drink sperm, does it cause any health problems?
There absolutely no health risks to swallowing sperm. It is pure protein and will not any way negatively affect you. Drink up.
It's Mental
No point in saying it in a round-about way: something is wrong. Even during foreplay, I have trouble staying erect, or even getting it there, as soon as a woman touches me something happens inside and my little soldier doesn’t salute. This is difficult for me as well as my partner, help please!
Has this been a problem in the past? Are you able to masturbate to completion?
The cause of this could psychological in nature. Losing an erection or an absence of ejaculation is caused by any number of anxiety-related concerns. Some men have conscious and unconscious worries that effect erections or block ejaculations. They may worry about hurting the woman, about pregnancy, or they may have guilt about having sexual pleasure (often religious injunctions). They may have difficulties with intimacy and/or commitment. They may also be haunted by that nemesis of sexual dysfunctions -- performance anxiety. In other words, they are just plain trying too hard. In these instances the man is so concerned about giving his partner pleasure that he loses track of his own.
For you, my guess is the last reason. You want to see a doctor (since I am NOT one!). Have you tried Viagra, Cialis or Levitra? You may want to take that first step. Ask your doctor.
First Orgasm
I received these two questions back to back about first orgasms.
I'm afraid when I actually do have my first orgasm I will pee on my boyfriend.
Is there any way to control your bladder without hindering an orgasm?
Also, what should I suggest for him to do to give me an orgasm so I don't disappoint him?Thanks!
My girlfriend and I have been together for three years, we love being intimate whenever we get together, which isn’t very often. So far we've only had oral sex and she claims to love it, unfortunately to my undying shame I haven't been able to make her cum. I'd give anything to make her orgasm so my question was this: on my most recent oral expedition, she got really into it... I thought she was going to orgasm but she eventually calmed down and told me she wasn't sure if she wanted to keep going. She told me later she felt like she was going to pee, since she's never had an orgasm before, she wasn’t sure if that’s what it really was so I told her and showed her an article, that it is normal to experience this sensation. Fortunately I think that she's over that fear now just because she wants to have an orgasm, but our method is usually me licking her clit and fingering her, which leads me to my question: if she gets to that point again, should I keep fingering her or should I pull my finger, will it matter whether it delays her orgasm? I've noticed in some movies that the stars stop altogether when the girl is having an orgasm, do girls prefer this or does it vary? What should I do when she's getting ready to reach that almighty point?
Don't worry, it's very, very rare that an accident like that would happen during orgasm, though you may occasionally feel the sensation of having to pee right before! But if it's something you're concerned about, simply go to the bathroom before sex. As a side note, urinating before and after sex is highly recommended to avoid nasty little bladder infections.
As for how to have an orgasm - it concerned me a little that you're worried about having one so as not to disappoint him. Make sure that you focus on your own pleasure and satisfaction as well. Find out what you enjoy so that YOU are not disappointed.
That said, a little exploration will go a long way! Spend time touching yourself to discover what works for you. Hard, fast, soft, slow, here or there? Invest in some toys and then bring your boyfriend into the mix. Tell him what you found out you enjoy.
A good and considerate lover will be open to communication, and will be willing to work with you to find what gets you off. Very, very few women are able to reach orgasm from penetration/sex alone - it will probably require a combination of oral/manual stimulation. Most importantly, focus on finding what feels good and don't stress over the orgasm immediately. The more you think about it, the harder and less fun it will be!
Good luck, be safe, and have fun!
First Kiss
My girlfriend wants to kiss me and I wanna kiss her but she can't seem to do it because its her first time.
How can I make her feel comfortable so I can kiss her?
Ah... I remember my first kiss! 14 years later, I still get a case of the giggles the first time I kiss someone new! Taking me by surprise seems to be the only way past it, and it can be very romantic. My boyfriend & I have been together 5 years now - when he first tried to kiss me, I knew he was about to and would start laughing. He waited until I was leaving, and moved in to kiss me before I realized he was going to, and I never giggled again!
So - next time your with her, wait until she least expects it, maybe while you're watching tv. Keep it simple, move towards her and just give her a gentle kiss (no scaring her off by jamming your tongue down her throat, and just light pressure of your lips on hers ok? Don't bruise her, but let her know you're there!) , hold it for a couple seconds, then move away. That should be a nice, not intimidating first kiss that will hopefully make her feel a little more comfortable.
Good luck!
Cohabitation
I see a lot of successful women today living in co-habitating relationship with men.
Is this really a healthy thing and how successful are these situations over a marriage or being single and not living together? It seems to me that the man has the better end of the deal without committing to a marriage. In a co-habitating situation, it seems like sex is based on a rent basis.
Do these relationship last and are they healthy? We not considering children in the scene.
What is your thoughts on this?
Well, Joe, I live with my boyfriend - we've been dating for 5+ years and living together for about 3. Speaking from my own experience, I think it's very healthy, and he isn't the only one benefiting from this situation! I, too, love having sex available to me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week!
It depends on each individual couple, really. Some aren't ready for, or interested in, marriage. That doesn't mean they don't want a commitment or to share their lives in some way. With divorce rates being so high these days, many younger people see it as a way to "try the car before they buy it" - to take the relationship further before making the final decision to marry. I, personally, would never marry someone before living with them first. I don't believe that I can really know someone unless I do.
Financially it also makes sense for many people. If they each pay rent on their own apartments, but spend most nights together at his or her place, why not just split the cost and pay one rent?
And for some, there's the distance issue. I know many people who were in long-distance relationships and it made more sense for one of them to move closer to the other and see how that worked before considering marriage (or instead of - again, not everyone is interested in marriage, and there's nothing wrong with that)!
Long story short, in this day and age it's the norm. And I think it's smart.
Mismatched Sex Drives
I am 35 years old and my boyfriend is 28 years of age. It seems like we are in different worlds when it comes to sex.
Usually it’s the man saying he isn't getting enough; this time it’s the opposite. I have never been this way with a man before: more open to try anything, and the more I get it the more I want it!
People say our age discrepancy is causing the problems due to our sex drive differences. This has become a serious problem. He’s unable to understand my higher libido and it sometimes makes me feel maybe I’m unattractive to him.
Kym
Dear K.
It is rare (and special!) when the sex drives of both people involved in a sexual relationship are equally matched. An imbalance in sexual interest among married couples is very common. One of the biggest problems marital counselors encounter in couples therapy is an incongruity of sexual desire between men and women.
There are many causes for a couple’s uneven sexual desire and for space constraints, I will keep this general.
Three major (and obviously related) causes that can greatly affect either gender’s libidos are: stress; depression and physical health.
Obviously any serious illness, from cancer, diabetes, thyroid disorders to drug and alcohol addictions are libido killers. Any cardiovascular problems reduce blood flow to the body, including the genitals, decreasing sexual interest.
Even a slight weight increase or cigarette smoking can greatly affect libido as we age.
Stress and anxiety, from work dilemmas to financial woes, can be considerably devastating to anyone’s sexual appetite.
Even mild depression is a clear infirmity. But just as tranquilizers and blood pressure medications can affect libido, many of the SSRIs used to treat depression can inhibit sexual desire.
How to Sync up Sexually
Open up the lines of communication. In the bedroom you must let him know how much he turns you on, how much you want to feel him and not that you are simply horny and need orgasmic relief. Many men are sensitive to the idea of feeling a little objectified (I’m sure to get a lot of letters to the contrary!). Do not take his rejection to heart and let it determine how you feel about yourself.
Communicate outside the bedroom as well. Talk it over in a calm, neutral, non-charged setting. Let your partner know you are open to making things better between you both. That’s half the battle.
Never Hurts to Educate Yourself
The following is a list of a few books on the subject:
  Mating In Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic ~ by Esther Perel |
  The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United State ~ Edward Lauman This is the most comprehensive survey of sexual practices since the Kinsey Report. |
  For Yourself, For Each Other: Sharing Sexual Intimacy ~ by Lonnie Barbach |
Masturbation Method
Meeting your sexual needs can be helped by you, yourself, and v(I)be. Masturbation is (and will always be) the tried and true way to fill the gaps. By getting yourself off you are not dependent on your partner to satisfy your arousals at the specific moments you may want or need them. Make your personal sessions something fantasy driven and fun, not depressing or guilt ridden. There are some great vibrators out there. Check out my shop page on vibrators. If you do not already own a vibrator, or if you do, maybe it’s time for an upgrade.
Check out the Rabbit Habit (designed by Vibratex).
Additional resources: webmd.com/sex/features/sex-drive-how-do-men-women-compare
Hope this helps.
N-A
Porn Addict
How does one know if they are addicted to porn? I think that I might be.
Short answer: Can you go a week (or even a day) without looking at porn? If that is difficult, then I'd say you are.
The quickest way that you can know if you are addicted to anything is if begins to become more important than the real experience. If you are unable to have a sexual realtionship without the use of porn, you may have an unhealthy reliance on it. Porn is great, but it isn't real. Porn is hot, but it isn't about connection between two people. I think you need to ask yourself if porn has become more important than the real thing, and if so, why? I dated a guy for a long time who really suffered a long road of pornography addiction, and I know it can be really difficult. If you are experiencing any of these things, I hope you can get some help. Sex Addicts Anonymous is a great place to work through some of these issues. And it's free. Before you look for outside help see if your will is strong enough to delete all the porn on your hard drive, throw away all porn magazines and movies and if you subscribe to porn site, cancel your account(s). If this is not possible for you to do, then SA might be for you.
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SCAM SITE REPORTS
The nature of the Web has changed in the last year. Companies that sell products use sneaky optimization practices, create “shadow” sites and write negative reviews and comments about their competitor’s products in the hope to steal the competition away and lure them to the actual Web site that sells the site that gets all the made up accolades. The more you search the Web for products, the more you’ll see these kinds of sites. They are practically identical in nature and companies pay a great deal of money to “buy” these ad positions on search engines like Google and Yahoo. In order to have their advertisements seen they pay more money for their competitions’ product and company name, more money than the competitors pay for their trademarked names themselves!
Website’s that Border on Trademark Infringement
This practice has gotten out of control in the sexual enhancer arena, in particular. Many readers ask me about all kinds of products and as I research them on the Web, I’ve become alarmed at what some Werbsellers will stoop to in order to garner Web traffic.
So … Knowing that money is tight in these difficult economic times, and because reader have brought some of this behavior to light, as a service to my readers (and anyone that shops on the Web), I feel it’s my duty to give out a few “protection” pointers when shopping for sexual enhancements on the Web. Show people some examples of bogus or shadow sites, and provide some simple ways to use these fictitious sites to your advantage in order to find the better product you are looking for.
For example, this is a random site (I’ve heard of Orexis because of consumer complaints; I’ve never heard of Zenerx) I’ve pulled of Google to illustrate how a shadow site is intended to work and how to spot what product the site is shilling for:
The URL is http://impotenceguide.info/orexis-review.html
The corny doctor with the clipboard is the first dead giveaway; the 2d is the “comparision” chart. I clicked on “Let Us Know About Male Products You Have Used - Good and Bad” and emailed the Web administrator. Here’s what I posted:
“I've used both products: Orexis and Zenerx and found them to be of no help when it comes to helping erectile dysfunction. These products did not work, especially Zenerx.
There is no substitute for ED pharmaceuticals like Viagra,® Cialis, ® and Levitra® Please compare Zenerx and Orexis with these top-selling ED medications.”
Because this ED “info” site is shilling for Zenerx, I can guarantee you not only will the site not publish my email, I will not even get a reply!
How to Spot Dubious Web Content
These sites are considered “shadow” or “shill” sites, meaning they are usually administered by a company selling a particular competing product. Shadow sites contain fabricated content (whether it be negative reviews of competitor’s product or fake or anonymous forum postings).The best way to spot these sites are if they are associated with sponsored ads (paid ads that are strategically placed on a search engine page (for example, Google) when a competitor’s product is typed in the search field. The obvious culprits are sites that claim to have hundreds of product reviews or product “comparison” charts. Some sites go as far as creating fictitious “awards” for the product that the page is shilling. Also, be on the lookout for sites with “blogs” that regardless of the product you are searching for, you are in some way magically “steered” to the same product that is somehow always mentioned as the “best” of the bunch.
Another dead giveaway is that the templates of each site (color, font, identical wording, etc) is almost always similar or exactly the same. This type of Web presence is illegal and dishonest.
How to Find Honest Product Reviews, Not Fake or “Planted” Ones
Before I list a bunch of the worst offenders, I want to explain how Web shoppers can discern honest user reviews from disguised ones.
The best way for users to find honest reviews and comments about products they’re thinking of purchasing is to read customer reviews on Amazon, eBay or some of the other legitimate auction sites. User comments found on sites like Amazon are verified before they are posted.
How Web Shoppers can Use These Fabricated Sites to Guide them to the Better Product
Companies that sell products that work don’t need to use their own product names to gain brand loyalty (For instance, the three ED medications I mentioned earlier (Viagra,® Cialis, ® and Levitra®) speak for themselves.
Lets take a look at how someone using a search engine like Google can use the keywords that trigger all these “paid-for” sites to find the optimal product.
For an example, I typed “Serogen” into Google’s search bar.
Here’s some of the sponsored ads that came up:
www.viswiss.com
http://www.herbal-sex-secrets.com/
http://www.themanschoice.com
http://www.everestnutrition.com/?SSAID=279755
http://www.libidez.com/
Each Libidez™ capsule contains 420mg of an incredibly potent all-natural Erection Boosting Blend! This particular blend took over 7 years to perfect.
Libidez™ is comprised of a special blend of Herbs, Mushrooms and Greens.
Sexual Stimulant Blend 180mg
Organic Green Blend 60mg
I’ve also listed a few sites that have come up on the radar as “questionable.” The sites I’ve mentioned have either been reported by customers to consumer spots such as www.ripoffreport.com and www.complaints.com as well as sites with pending lawsuits against them as reported by Internet press release news services.
The following sites are guilty of this fraudulent behavior (most all of them are associated with the product, Orexis, distributed by Urban Nutrition.
www.ManTested.com
www.Herbal-Sex-Secrets.com
www.mensblogcustomers.com
www.themanschoice.com
www.mensblogtalk.com
I encourage my readers send email to me if you feel you have been misled or believe you have purchased a bogus product from a questionable Webseller.
Here are some other links to consumer complaints and board discussions that involve various male enhancement products (the names of the products are mentioned in the complaints and forum threads):
http://www.ripoffreport.com/reports/0/340/RipOff0340676.htm
http://www.ripoffreport.com/reports/0/129/RipOff0129374.htm#95699
http://www.ripoffreport.com/reports/0/059/RipOff0059819.htm
http://www.complaintsboard.com/complaints/rip-off-c146214.html
http://boards.webmd.com/webx?THD@@.899f24ac!thdchild=.899f24ac/6
http://learntheropes.net/reports/2009/01/the-truth-about-the-original-swedish-ropes-formula/