Retrograde Ejaculation
Dear Nancy-Ann, I have no problem getting an erection. As a matter of fact I can get it up everyday if necessary. My problem is with ejaculation. My girlfriend loves oral sex and isn't satisfied unless I come in her mouth. She wants to swallow as much of my semen as she can get but the problem is she is not getting any because when I climax there is no semen pumping out of my penis.
My penis throbs like I was going to come but no semen. All my climaxes have been dry runs. What is my problem and will any of the Serogen products work for me?
Bobby
Well Bobby, let me first say I don’t know who I envy more, you or girlfriend. A partner who’s willing AND able is every girls wish. As for your lack of ejaculate during climax, that may be potentially more serious. It sounds like what you are experiencing is a condition called retrograde ejaculation. The causes range from diabetes, BPH, side effects of certain prescription meds, or the results of surgical procedures. I am not a doctor, so please don’t take this as a professional diagnosis!! Get to a doctor.
I am an outspoken believer in the beneficial qualities of Serogen, as it promotes overall prostate health. In your case, I suggest you consult a urologist as soon as possible to get your condition diagnosed correctly so you then find out from a professional what your options are.
Speak Up!
Nancy-Ann,
My girlfriend and I have been together for about 3 years and I have no problem getting her to achieve orgasm. But she is never very vocal during sex, which makes me feel like it’s not big enough. I've talked to her about getting penis enlargement pills but she says that it would only make the sex bad. Should I try to secretly increase my size with pills? And why is she not vocal when we have sex?
BH - Via the Internet
BH,
Why is it you equate your girlfriend not being vocal during sex with your penis size and your self-perception of its (inadequate) measurement? Maybe she's just not an openly vocal person when it comes to sex. Not all women are. Many feel embarrassed to hear themselves out loud. Some prefer to be in their heads and bodies instead of being overly, verbally demonstrative.
It seems your girlfriend is perfectly satisfied with your size and technique; I mean, you say she reaches orgasm, right? So what's the problem with your size? This seems like an issue of inadequacy conjured solely in your mind.
Instead of talking to her about getting enlargement pills, why not talk to her about how much of a turn-on it would be if she could tell you (aloud) how it feels while you're getting her off?
Hope this helps.
N-A
Touchy, Tickley Situation
Dear Nancy:
My girlfriend has a very sensitive clit and it is so hard giving her oral sex. She says it hurts sometimes or it tickles too much. Can you give me any advice on what I need to do? Oral sex is one of my favorite things and its not working out.
E.S. - Via Internet
This is a "touchy" situation! Hmmm. The best way to approach her is to be verbally open, first and foremost, letting her know how important it is to please her orally. Then ... first step: warm her up with a bunch of foreplay. Next step: Let her touch herself while your mug is down in the area to be sucked. Let her allow herself to get excited and "loose" ... talk it out. This can be very sexy! Then let her guide first your fingers, then mouth and tongue, gently (tell her to keep an open dialogue the whole while).
With this type of approach, you hope that she becomes comfortable. If you're both patient enough, it will happen and the rewards will be unforgettable!
Last note: Do you have a beard or mustache? Chin spinach can be abrasive and uncomfortable. Even a light but coarse five-o'clock shadow can make for a tickle.
Hope this helps.
N-A
Small Penis
My penis is really, REALLY SMALL, and I am afraid that when time comes for me to have sex with my girlfriend, she will just laugh, and then dump me for being really small. What can I do?!?!??!
What can you do? There is only one option. Tell her.
You can't know until you try. Worst case is that you will get laughed at and/or she will dump you. Best case is that she won't care what size you are. You won't find out unless you talk to her.
The question : Does size matter?
The answer: Yes. But....
But... not to all women. Some women are "size queens" and size is of vital importance. Other women are far more concerned about technique or foreplay or simply personality.
I don't know what you mean by REALLY small. Average is 5" to 6". Small would be below 5" and REALLY small would be below 4". In my mind at any rate. Size is also in the eyes of the beholder. If your girlfriend is a virgin or has only been with lesser endowed men then she won't be put off.
Also, woman's vagina's vary in size too. Some women want a smaller penis as larger ones hurt them.
Good luck.
Bigger Cock, Louder Sex?
My girlfriend and I have been together for about three years and I have no problem getting her to achieve orgasm, but she is never very vocal during sex, which makes me feel like it’s not big enough. I’ve talked to her about getting penis enlargement pills, but she says that’s a bad idea. Should I try to secretly increase the size with pills? And why is she not vocal when we have sex?
First off, I would not try secretly increasing the size of your penis. The pills that you see advertised everywhere do not work. They are a waste of money. Secondly, your girlfriend not being vocal during sex probably has nothing to do with the size of your penis. Women are often quite shy about making a lot of noise while they are having sex. Are you very vocal during sex? This is the place to start. Show her how sexy you think it is to show how turned on you are. Try talking dirty. Tell her exactly what you are going to do to her. Talk to her while you do it. Ask her what she likes. Ask her what she wants. Make her feel comfortable and unembarrassed about making noise. I bet it’ll make a big difference.
Ex Sex
I have a problem.
I used to be married but I got divorced. I am currently living with someone else but for the last 2 years since my divorce I am still going to my x wife's house at night and we have sex. Better then ever.
I know I still love her and that she loves me. The only thing is the last couple of days she is turning me down and saying to me: "No don't come today; I will call you" and stuff. I tell her on a daily basis: "Let's try it, let's see each other like this for some time and if it goes fine I will leave my current girl friend and come back to where I wanna be".
The question is what can I do to show her that I wanna try to do just that?? Because for her it is like I just wanna come over have sex, cum and leave, and for me it isn't like that. The last time I walked in and she said take of you clothes. She took of her p.j.'s, she was naked there and she said come do what you gotta do, fuck me and leave. I did have sex with her because at my house with my current girl friend I'm not having sex because of the mixed feelings and wanting my ex wife so yes. I penetrated her and yes I fucked her but it was just in out in out cum cum and that's it.
When she said to me take of your clothes for me it was like wawww she wants to see me naked and she wants to play with me and suck my cock and stuff but noooo just in out in out no kisses no nothing she did not even want me to lick and suck her pussy + titties.
What should I do?
Whether you and your wife get back together or not there's something you need to take care of immediately: STOP CHEATING ON YOUR GIRLFRIEND. If you want to be with your ex-wife, then why are you still living with someone else? It is unfair to your girlfriend to have you running around to have sex with your ex-wife like this, ok?
First things first: Confess to your girlfriend and end that relationship. If you want to stay with your girlfriend, then you MUST stop seeing your ex-wife.
As for your ex-wife: There's a reason she's your ex-wife and I'd be willing to bet that you aren't the only man she's having sex with. Let's pretend, for a moment, that maybe she does want to be with you again - the fact that you live with someone else is a bit of a problem, isn't it? If your ex-wife wants proof that you want to try, then be a man and step up and leave your current girlfriend.
In any case, I feel sorry for your current girlfriend - seeing how you're treating her, I can't blame your ex-wife for saying what she does. You need to do the right thing here and stop lying to everyone involved and get yourself out of this mess.
Cyber Sex
Hey there Nancy, got a question for you. I've been with my girlfriend for oh....almost four and a half years now. I am very attracted to her, but when it comes to getting some well....She's not always as excited as me! She's been on vacation all this week, kicking it at home and relaxing you know? Well, I snooped a little and I found out she has herself signed up for "cyber sex" on a COUPLE of different adult web sites!
Needless to say I was pissed, but I couldn't tell her I went snooping, you know? So my question is this. Since I'm not getting any, do you think she may possibing having these little conversations or chat sessions and getting her action that way? Should I be upset if she IS talking dirty with other people? Im stumped here and I just don't really know how to feel about this. I love her and I want to get my groove on, but she's just.....I don't know.
This is a sticky situation, but you absolutely should confront her. Yes, it's wrong to snoop, but... it's not a black and white situation. However, you did find something upsetting, she's been lying to you, and you need to talk about it. Open the conversation by telling her the lack of sex has been bothering you, and that you snooped (tell her what you told me - you felt bad about it, but...) and what you found. See what she has to say.
In this day and age, cyber sex and chats, etc are getting to be a big problem for many people and for many it's not clearly defined. I've had this conversation with my boyfriend and we've defined what is and is not acceptable. For me, it's cheating. Anything that he would not tell me about is probably crossing the line. To be fair, if you haven't defined what makes you uncomfortable or what crosses the line for you, give her a chance to talk about it. But once you tell her it's unacceptable to you, if she won't respect that or disagrees, you'll have to think about what that means for you. A good test is that if you hide it from your partner, you shouldn't be doing it.
First Kiss
My girlfriend wants to kiss me and I wanna kiss her but she can't seem to do it because its her first time.
How can I make her feel comfortable so I can kiss her?
Ah... I remember my first kiss! 14 years later, I still get a case of the giggles the first time I kiss someone new! Taking me by surprise seems to be the only way past it, and it can be very romantic. My boyfriend & I have been together 5 years now - when he first tried to kiss me, I knew he was about to and would start laughing. He waited until I was leaving, and moved in to kiss me before I realized he was going to, and I never giggled again!
So - next time your with her, wait until she least expects it, maybe while you're watching tv. Keep it simple, move towards her and just give her a gentle kiss (no scaring her off by jamming your tongue down her throat, and just light pressure of your lips on hers ok? Don't bruise her, but let her know you're there!) , hold it for a couple seconds, then move away. That should be a nice, not intimidating first kiss that will hopefully make her feel a little more comfortable.
Good luck!
Bend Over Boyfriend
I have no doubt that I am straight, but lately I've been wanting my girlfriend to put on a strap on and fuck me.
How do I ask this? My ex-girlfriend introduced me to putting her fingers inside my anus during oral sex, and ever since I have been addicted to the feeling. Should I feel ashamed when I finger my anus when going down on a girl? When my wife gives me hand jobs she sometimes puts a small vibrator in my ass. I like this it makes me get off so hard. I often wonder what it would feel like to use a larger one, but I don't know how to ask her. I don't want her to get freaked out by just coming out and asking for a bigger one.
Do you have any good ideals on how I might ask her?
Thanks for any help!
Lucky you for having met someone who introduced you to something
new! You absolutely should NOT feel anything bad about what you enjoy. Many, many men enjoy the well-placed finger, whether their own or a partner's. Why not take it up a notch and position yourself in a way that lets your girlfriend have that access to you while you go down on her? Of course, doing it for yourself is just fine but feel free to clue any future partners in about what turns you on as well!
I wouldn't worry too much about freaking her out, as she's already ok with the idea of using toys on you. If you want to try something bigger, you have a few options. You could ask as she's using the small vibrator - it's quite sexy to tell someone how much you enjoy what they're doing to you, and then add, "What do you think about trying something bigger?" Or, surprise her - buy a toy you'd like to try and next time she reaches for the vibrator, have the new toy ready and ask, with a big smile, "Can we try this one?". OR - simply talk to her, talk about how much you enjoy what she does, that you're glad the two of you are comfortable enough together to explore different things, sexually. Ask if there's anything else she'd like to try which will probably lead to asking the same of you and then you can tell her. You never know - she may already be thinking the same thing! 
Desensitized?
Sensagen’s™ Proprietary Female Impulse Support Blend (FISB) is an assortment of high-end extracts that when combined offer women heightened and sustained sexual pleasure.
My girlfriend has recently enjoyed the use of sex toys, but it has not been positive in our sex life together. Now she cannot have an orgasm with me alone, as she once did several times during sex. It makes me feel like I am not doing my job anymore. Any advice?
Sex toys are great and can often be really important in having a healthy sexual relationship. In your case, it seems like sex toys are causing a bit of a problem. First off, I would suggest that you talk to your girlfriend about your concern that you are being replaced by toys. Sometimes what can help keep her sensitized is if she alternates using sex toys while she masturbates with using her hands. Help her get off without using sex toys. Stimulate her clit a bit more during foreplay. Give foreplay more time and really focus on making sure that she is close to orgasm before you actually have sex.
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