I just met a woman I like a lot, but she has difficulties reaching orgasm. She told me she had this issue before meeting me, but I thought I could "make" it happen. We’re both in our thirties and I never had a problem bringing any of my prior partners to climax.
Moreover, I have noticed she has a small clitoris. She’s come close from both oral sex and intercourse, but she has yet to reach orgasm. She mentioned the closest she’s gotten to having an orgasm is with me, especially during our first sexual encounter. Maybe it will eventually happen, but right now it seems she really doesn't have any confidence in her own success.
I do realize that her mindset has a lot to do with accomplishing our goal. She has had success with toys, but we really want to achieve this special moment when we’re both together.
Any suggestions?
R
Dear R,
Much of women reaching orgasm has to do with a female’s individual physiology. Regardless of your lady’s clit size, she still needs direct vaginal stimulus and clitoral friction to aid in reaching climax. And even with the proper stimulation, she still may not be able to push herself over the edge into bliss (in most cases, this is a psychological block).
Both of you should start by using her toys as a part of sex. Better to feel satisfied that she can reach orgasm with the help of sexual aides. By using these sexual accessories, this will allow her an adequate comfort level, as well as bestow you the confidence that her orgasms are possible with you present and “hands on.” Remember a genuine intimacy can be had by both when using sexual aids. This can (and should) lead you both to experiment with new sexual positions. Some women find it easier to reach orgasm when they’re on top; while she rides our pole, use your fingers to stimulate her clit. Additionally, when performing cunnilingus, open up her lips, find her magic button and alternately rub her clit and use our tongue and teeth to (gently!) nibble on her clit.
Additional resource:
http://www.seductioninsider.com/sex_tips/techniques_female_orgasm.shtml
Hope this helps.
N-A
